The Daily Satirist is now able to print the redacted story in full. After much squabbling with the powers that be our team of lawyers were able to regain the right to publish the story.
Montreal- The City of Montreal is going ahead with their new environmental plan entitled less is more green for us. One of the first plans is to pave over a much loved community garden and erect high end condominiums "There is just not enough place for the rich to live," said a spokesman for the project. "Montreal is a small city with few population and less fewer rich people, so we must make them feel love."
Asked about the carbon footprint of the project named, kick back the green a spokesman for the city assured the press that the building only the first of many green friendly ventures that the city has just finalized with several construction firms in the city. "The condos will be green. In fact the contractors ordered special green limestone bricks special from Italy. They had to be flown in on a special airbus. The state of the art heated all-season balconies will also be green, a premium green veneer to cover the concrete. I'm told it's truly lovely, you can sun bath in shorts in January. Hydro-Quebec was at the forefront the technology. A marvel of modern mechanization."
Along with the condo many upscale coffee shops and boutiques will be moving into the otherwise working class neighborhood. The mayor who was also on hand for the ribbon cutting ceremony could be seen holding a coffee cup from one the said shops. When asked about the project he had nothing but glowing remarks, despite what he called, "the fanatical green poo pooers worried about their garden and their tomatoes. As mayor it's my job to look out for all of my constituents and make sure the well to-do have a good place to come home to."
No comments:
Post a Comment